Medical Music Mondays: Whoop! 100 Days
Pertussis AKA whooping cough is on the rise due to declining vaccination rates. The initial catarrhal phase has mild symptoms but is super contagious. Then you cough like forever.
Medical Music Mondays: Constipation Nation
The Rome IV criteria are how you diagnose constipation. Also X-Rays don't help. And "The Red Hot Chili Poopers" would be a great name for a tribute band.
Medical Music Mondays: Hip Pain Blues
The Kocher criteria can help you rule out a septic hip. Transient Synovitis is a much better diagnosis. It used to be called Toxic Synovitis, but that name was too scary so it got changed.
Medical Music Mondays: Shiny Happy Virus
You don't need to send comprehensive viral tests in the majority of children with cough and congestion. Just make a clinical diagnosis dang it!
Medical Music Mondays: Palpable Olive Season
Hypertrophic pyloric stenosis is such a down home diagnosis. You bring your baby home and then their weight goes down. Also the ultrasound measurements are a muscle wall greater than 3mm thick and a channel length greater than 14mm. 3 and 14 - 3.14, pi. Get it? Did you read this far?
Medical Music Mondays: Bleeding Tonsil Funk
Night terrors are super scary. And the kid doesn't even remember them! They're more like sleep walking than nightmares and parents are often worried that it's a seizure or something more serious.
Medical Music Mondays: Terror of the Night
Night terrors are super scary. And the kid doesn't even remember them! They're more like sleep walking than nightmares and parents are often worried that it's a seizure or something more serious.
Medical Music Mondays: The Pinworm Shuffle
Pinworms! Ahhhhh! They itch at night and they're scary. Fortunately they are easy to treat and eradicate. They're still gross.
Medical Music Mondays: Lipase High!
Did you know that pancreatitis is mostly caused by viruses in kids? They don't drink alcohol or get gallstones like grown ups. Also, scorpion bites apparently cause it. But that's silly and only something you see in board review books. Anyway, this would be a better Broadway musical than most retreads of 1980s & 90s movies.
Medical Music Mondays: Factor First!
Children with Hemophilia who present to the ED need to get a dose of Factor First! Don't delay and give their home factor if they have it.